Clarity is a God thing.  It is Him lifting the veil to questions asked, prayers, uncertainties, past choices and experiences.  It is a conviction from the Holy Spirit after months of praying myself, and asking sisters to pray for me.  I yearned for this clarity, so I could move forward with a focus...I've yearned for this clarity, prayed for this clarity, talked about yearning for this clarity...since January.  Months had to pass, God had so much more He needed to show me before my heart would be willing to accept this.  It comes as to no surprise that I received this clarity during a conversation with my dear, dear friend and former neighbor Brenda, one sentence from her and...BOOM, all of the puzzle pieces fall into place.  

Like I mentioned, for months I had been struggling with my photography business, wanting to grow and change, seeing that this growth is a necessary step in order for me to make a business, a career, for my family and more than a side job.  But, I was so closed off to seeing it or worrying about a misstep...I froze and did nothing.  I wrestled in my head, "What is your problem Mackenzie??"  "If you love doing this so much, why are you not working at it?"  Something just held me back, continued to hold me back.  I felt that if I go all in with building this business, revamping all that I've done for the last 6 years, I would have to give up something and there was nothing I was willing to lose.  I love that I get to capture the essence of your family, the details of your wedding day, I truly do, but I have felt very confused with all of it, the choices and changes I need to make in order for Neer and Far to thrive for my family...not just survive.  Clarity for this specific issue has graced the page of many a prayer request book, prayer request notecard, and in discussions with friends.  But, I continued to feel uneasy and foggy with how to move forward.  

Foggy and on a cliff of uncertainty.Maybe i'm being a little dramatic, but it was foggy.

That is until yesterday, August 14.

I hadn't talked with Brenda for weeks and felt like I just needed to catch up, let her know about new prayer requests, updates on the kids and Sean and ask for counsel on how to move forward this fall with what is looking to be a busy schedule with God.  A little background on our neighbors, they are the ones who told us about Christ.  They prayed for us for four years before that fateful day we knocked on their door three years ago, August 11th, and further committed our lives to Christ.  They showed us what it truly looks like to be a follower of Christ, they discipled as Paul did...they were different and God softened our hearts to accept what they had to share.  They hold a huge place in our hearts, they're family.  They welcomed us into their home, as we did for them without judgement, even before we were Christians.  They loved us like Jesus says to "love one another as you would love yourself", they mentored us, they counseled us, they encouraged us, they showed us what it means to live a godly life.  God has shown me that through the unwise decision of buying our house, He had an ultimate plan and every time I look back on it, tears spring to my eyes.  We needed them. Sometimes you don't have to look any further than right next door.  

So, I chatted with her yesterday about a variety of God things because it seems that He's always our main topic of conversation and we both love it.  I told her about my dilemma's with regard to all the awesome things going on starting in the fall.  I will be the Historian for PWOC, possibly teaching a PWOC class (if I get selected for that!), doing a Bible in a Year group and then there's also the Precept Revelation study that starts, in addition to my daily devotional, time with husband, kids and friends AND I have to work out and then there's my photography.  I have been on the fence about the Revelation study because 1) Revelation is a daunting book of the Bible and it scares me a little, 2) I have a tendency to get lost in the Precept study I'm doing now...lost in a good way ie. hours of study and 3) time, time, time.  And she said the most amazingly OBVIOUS and simple thing, "I would encourage you to take these opportunities to grow in God and RUN WITH THEM.  You have an incredible opportunity for huge growth with these women encouraging you along the way, nothing that he is asking you to do is difficult to get to.  This could be an amazing season of growth and God has put all of these women in your path for that reason...I firmly believe that."  It dawned on me that this time here with these godly, wise, Christian sisters is fleeting.  I will never be in this position again...we WILL move, they WILL move, it will NEVER be this easy-logistically speaking-to fellowship, serve, worship with sisters in Christ.  Now is my time to build my bedrock which is what I thought I was doing, but I was unwilling to accept the fact that maybe the business side of my photography needed a rest.  It's not defeat...just a different season of life.  God knows what's coming down the line for us, not me...He's put me here specifically to grow in Him to prepare my heart for the times down the road.  

I will always have my camera.  I've built a business once without God, but the next time I will seek His face in every facet of that process and it'll be strong because He is strong and through Him I can do great things, then again maybe I won't, but right now I see that I need to rest in Him, get to know Him so I can prepare my heart, my mind for future endeavors.  Some things I know, but still need to hear them over and over for them to sink in, thanks Brenda for this one, "If you decide to do this, I know for a fact that you won't look back at your time in Naples and regret spending all of that time with God and all of those women He's planted in your life."        

Months and months of fog cleared like that first day of sunshine in Seattle.  

What a glorious thing seeing the Light is...

And just three years and a couple of days from the day we received Christ, God blessed me with clarity from the woman who believed in us all along.  

Clarity is the sweetest thing. 

Grazie mille amici!

Mackenzie

Mt. Vesuvio groupie:-)